the pains of having a conscious

So... there have been a couple things going on recently...

1. a friend that i have been conversing with on a personals site is planning on coming down to atlanta for a conference or training session for work. He really wants to meet up with me... he's a really nice guy from NYC... we do a lot of flirting... he did mention that he wanted to stay in town a couple extra days... now... assuming this is on a weekend when I am home, he wanted to know if he could stay with me for a night or two to explore the city. He was looking at hotels in the area, and the only "cheap" hotels he could find were down by the airport... well... duh... the airport hotels are in a seedy area... no area around any airport that I am aware of is really "nice"

So... he wanted to know if it was a good area, and how accessible is it to marta, because he wants to hang out with me... now... he mentioned the phrase "if i could stay there" it was kinda in and out of context... So I asked him... "did you just ask if you could stay with me?" He took that as I was inviting him to stay with me for a night and mentioned what happens if some naughty stuff happens?

Well... i mean... he's a nice guy... NO i haven't talked to him on the phone yet, he doesn't look like a serial killer, and he's kinda so skinny, i could definately take him should anything get remotely out of hand, which I know it won't... but what do i do... i gave him a couple alternatives incase i "wasn't in town" for those extra one or two days he was here for... but still... i kinda feel bad... i KNOW i don't owe him anything... but... he's a nice guy... I also don't know how to explain that... well... i am boring... and he would probably be better off at a hotel, though, i think he wants sex... so who knows...

2. whew... number 1 was long wasn't it?

Okay... this is kinda a messed up one...

There is this guy who really likes me... He's really sweet...and super nice... I have chatted with him on the phone on several occasions. He seems to be super smart and has an amazing outlook on life... He's also adorable.

So what's the problem huh?

a. he lives in Rome Ga... about an hour drive, and he doesn't have a car to drive here...
b. he's kinda a convicted sex offender... which he has explained what has happened and hopefully is working on getting his name cleared...
c. he's young... 22 to be exact... like 10 years younger than me... that's kinda tough..
d. *RECORD SCREECH*...

yes... he's a convicted sex offender... i believe that he did not do what he was convicted of... but i have no proof one way or another to validate that claim. All i DO know is, he is out on probation, and he's very sweet... his personality does not appear to be that of a sex offender... and trying to see the good in people... i believe him until proven otherwise.

anyway... he was gone for a while, and he just popped back up again today. He wants to start talking to me again. I have to be honest... I do kinda miss talking to him, but i let him know that anything between us would be very difficult to hold with my job, travel schedule, the fact i don't like to drive, etc... I don't want to blow him off ofcourse... and he has been nothing but nice to me... so... what to do...

3. Yes... 3... there is a guy in this area, who seems to have a job, is fairly stable, etc.. who is interested in me. Despite my warnings (yes... i know) that i travel a lot and such, he would like to get together for a date... I think that's awesome, however, i don't know what's holding me back... probably just myself...

He offered to buy me dinner, I mentioned lets take it a little slower and start with coffee... I mentioned i am not interested in just JUMPING into a relationship because when i do, it always seems to just far apart before it really starts. So I suggested we be friends, and start from there... he agreed, but now i think that he thinks i don't like him... I did mention my travel schedule and he seemed to mention that he didn't mind that etc... i don't know... i have always been single... I have always wanted to be with someone... but... what if i get exactly what I want and than decide i don't want it anymore... *shrug* just my own SIPT talking...

*yawn* it's midnight and i am tired... i am headed to bed.

-O